Never Too Old To Learn New Tricks

So tonight instead of circle we celebrated our youngest daughter birthday eve with the girls. One friend said, "At our house we celebrate the eve's of birthdays." And a new tradition was born. I also learned a few new tricks, some cool keyboard shortcuts to use on my shiney new laptop. You see, I am not kidding when I tell you that I am electronically challenged. Technology used to scare me out of my mind. Sometimes today I can still hear my ex-husband screaming at me when I was trying to use the computer for the very first time. His screams would make me freeze, terrified that I would make a huge mistake by touching the wrong key. Much like my 3rd grade teacher who would yell at a "dyslexic left handed me" while I was leaning over my desk wishing to flee from the embarrassment she dished out daily. Bottom line; I stopped feeling school was a safe please to escape from the hell that was my home life. I think I closed down a lot too. Learning something new has always brought with it great anxiety. At first tonight I felt uncomfortable again (embarrassed) but then something wonderful happened. We started laughing. All of us and it felt really great. It brought deeper healing within my inner child or damaged adult. I realized that gone was the little girl who hated to try replaced with a woman who was excited to learn something new again. I wanted to know more. So I asked more questions. Wow, I have overcome so much in my life. I know that I am stronger, happier and wiser now. I am at last safe and sound. Loved and surrounded by the most amazing people. They are gentle, kind and talented. And I am so incredibly grateful for the gifts.