For a Fill and a Song!

So on Wed I went in for my 1st lap band fill. Now that was a weird adventure. The lowlight was the anxiety and the needle was so big it could have tapped an elephant. The highlight was the "Novocain" and number I posted on the scale. I am down 37 lbs in 7 weeks! I can't believe it. My Dr was humming and happy. I was numb and thrilled. I go back in 6 weeks. I am walking daily, using hand weights and resistance bands. But I am back on liquids for a few days until I adjust to this change. I am tight and sore now as my body gets used to this pressure and the new restriction. At least that is what they tell me.
At the PSC Annual Membership Meeting, they presented me with a gorgeous new ocean blue guitar. What a dream come true! I had a plain one a long time ago. As a painfully shy 14 year old I began lessons with an awesome music teacher (Mr Milk's) who encouraged me to sing publicly. He choose me for solos in the choir and then offered me a spot in the music group called "The Singing Swinging 7" at our school. The very best thing to ever happen to me as a student in the education system. In those days I actually felt that God had thrown me a lifeline. Music allowed me to express my inner most emotions through...SONG. But my happiness was short lived when my abusive father broke the instrument in half and ordered me to STOP after school rehearsals and the private guitar lessons and voice coaching my kind teacher offered free to me. After loosing something that was so important to me, I was even more withdrawn, and I never found anything else that I excelled in school wise.
As an adult I have always "wished" to find someone that had the patience to teach a dyslexic south paw to play. I love all types of mucic and have always had musicians as friends. And Spirit sent me a new talented friend last year that was up for the challenge. Out of the blue on day, she said Spirit told her to teach me how to play the guitar. Did I want to learn or were her gifts "off"? She also saw that we would be singing/playing together at PSC and with the choir. Mentioned an album called, "Howe The Wind Blows". All I could do was laugh but it was followed by a great big teary YES! I am having my 1st lesson today. Please pray for her. I love to sing, have been doing karaoke for years (won many contests over the years) out and about. (A shout out to the "Girls Night Out Gang") I always have new and old lyrics bouncing around in my head, so I figured it is fine time to put this all together.
However, I was surprised when I mentioned it to my oldest daughter the other day and she was less then supportive. We had just gone a round about me cutting my hair off and spiking it blond( my natural color is now white platinum blond. Over the next 5 months I am slowly going back to all natural) She said " Mom, when are you going to finally grow up and stop trying new things? Stunned, I felt her words sting me. Somehow I managed to sputter out: I guess.....NEVER! I am only 47 years old Heather. After she left I was still thinking, Am I too old to be doing something like this? Am I being foolish? Maybe I am I having a mid life crisis or something. Clear as a bell my Soul screamed NO. Immediately an inner peace followed.
I really don't care anymore what others think about me, or what I am doing or learning. I am "over" being judged or criticized by people who don't really understand what I have overcome in this lifetime. I am for the first time, doing what makes me happy. I am not sacrificing myself any longer.
I am nurturing and tending to my damaged inner child. Part of this process is to keep doing things that will allow me to heal the past and continue to grow. A few months ago, I made a promise to release and let go of the horrible experiences that I allowed to destroy parts of me. These "bits" can be found again, the emotions revisited, so I can rewrite them with much happier endings..
Life's lessons do not need to be painful or debilitating. They just need our permission and courage to allow the true soul lessons to materialize when we are ready. I know it took great COURAGE to survive my childhood. But now I can THRIVE and celebrate my life in my adulthood. For my UNBREAKABLE SPIRIT is the true author of my "happily ever after". And I am grateful.....